Growing Pains

Growing Pains 

This is to anyone who is suffering now so that they can gain more later.

For everyone who is living with less now, in hopes of living with more later. 

This is for those who are at a stage in their life that is filled with anxiety and uncertainty about their recent decisions in life. 

&& for anyone who knows someone who feels a little something like this… 

Lately I have doubted myself… more than I have ever doubted myself before. 

When you choose the route of continuing your education instead of working, starting a family, getting married, buying a house SOMETIMES you see that happening with people you know or once knew and you wonder to yourself if you made the right decision and if all the hard work is going to be worth it in the end. 

I know I am not alone on this. I know a lot of women and a few guys who have chosen to further their education first instead of doing other things with their life that they may have wanted to do… We are living in times where it is so extremely hard to balance. 

Balancing school work, paid work, required unpaid work, romantic relationships, friendships, family and all the other things that come up in this thing we call LIFE. It has been extremely overwhelming for me over these past few months. Although I try and put on a face and smile and power through it what is happening inside is really me waiting and wondering for a sign or more signs that I am where I am supposed to be and I am doing what I am supposed to be doing. 

Up until this point I have never been a quitter. I have not quit one thing (that I can think of) So why now am I wondering if quitting is the best option for me. I would be lying if I did not say that I have contemplated it…. Luckily with prayer and support from all the people who love me, I have been able to keep getting up and pushing through. 

One day he told me something… he said, “babe, it’s just growing pains” We are going through it now but we will come out bigger, stronger, smarter and more well off. I guess I did not think of all my intrusive thoughts and self doubt as growing pains… and I thought to myself that’s a perfect way of putting it. 

Growing is not easy. Change can be so hard.. and in this phase of my life it’s been change after change after change. You may be able to relate, or you might not… the point of this post is to just say.. Growing pains are normal. They hurt. Sometimes you may want to throw in the towel and walk away, you might feel you’re not good enough, you might feel you do not know who you are or that you made the wrong decision. I am not all the way through my growing pains and I have quite a ways to go yet, BUT hearing that has changed my perspective on my life’s situation at this time and given me the fuel I need to keep on pushing. Maybe reading this will give you something too. 

Best, 

Lamz

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